Script Consulting and Analysis by Touchwood Pictures ltd - Scriptwriting services - Reading and analysis.

TESTIMONIALS


LOUISIANA BLOOD

Some times when I’m reading a script I catch myself checking the page number, unconsciously hoping the read will end soon. But there are great scripts, like Louisiana Blood, where I didn’t want the read to end.  

Louisiana Blood is an extremely well written screenplay. It’s tight, and the language is as good as the best. It had me on the edge of my seat all the way through.

When I was a quarter of the way into the script I found myself saying “Wow. What great dialogue (e.g., Roxie - "Most men don't know they can use their mouth as a communication device" and Mrs. Dalwhinny, " Well Gentlemen, you didn't come all the way out here just to perspire with me. What exactly do you want?").

Indeed, Mike took me on a wonderful Jack-the-Ripper mystery trip. Bravo Mr. Donald!   Robert Gately – author, teacher, screenplay judge




SHADOW TRADE

 This is a great action/thriller premise that really delivers on its conceit. The story is jam-packed with action but also has a great topical aspect to it (because of the financial system aspect) that feels very current and relevant. 

This script is a great high concept genre piece with an instant built-in core audience as well as a strong hook that is easy to articulate. Fans of the Bond movies, the Bourne trilogy, or any serious action/thriller will have no trouble latching onto this story and finding something to like about the concept.

The characters all feel very well rendered overall and could be great roles for the right talent. Brickman especially could be an outstanding role for the right supporting actor and of course there’s loads of fun to be had in watching two potentially A-list leading men play off of each other as Elliot and De Silva. The concept combines familiar elements in a way that makes for a compelling concept overall.



ROSE'S WAR


We would like to take this opportunity to congratulating you. We received nearly a thousand scripts, out of which your script “Rose’s War” was one of the best.

From the four that were picked out of the thousand entries by the judges, Rose's War
was one of them!

It was a delightful read and something we could see being produced!

The Independent Short Film, Music & Art Festival will take place February 19-21, 2010. The award ceremony will take place on February 21, 2010.

The festival itself will take place in Long Beach, California at the historical Queen Mary.



DEADEYE

 The script is a quick read, briskly moving from one scene to the next. But it did something very important for this kind of story, which is grab my attention right from the very first scene.

We see David and Iona in what at first seems like a dangerous situation, maybe a kidnapping, and then it is revealed as a romantic excursion. Immediately after, we are in what seems like a terrorist bomb situation with supernatural overtones, and David is blown out of the story.

This is an action picture that starts off like lightning, and we immediately invest in Iona and her situation. By the time supernatural characters begin popping up, we are curious where the adventure will take her.  

The villains are well sketched; kind of like the monsters from another dimension in HELLRAISER who pop up, make a big splash, and hardly say anything. It was impressive to see you create these villains with minimal dialogue; and in fact the less they say and the more they do, the more terrifying they become.

The sequence where they wipe out an entire squad of cops silently is an action setpiece of merit, and the script has the audacity to kill off the central character (only to revive her with that wonderful bit of narrative tension: the ticking clock that reminds her she is running out of time).

 Iona’s fantasy sequences have great imagery such as the birds flying backwards and the sandstorms; the sequence with Jimmy takes them into an interesting realm of timelessness. So the script takes imaginative leaps beyond the CSI crime labs and makes it something unique: a crime thriller with a revenge plot in the realm of the supernatural. Not a bad medley…   

The writing style is very strong, with terse screen directions and dialogue that gets right to the point.  It doesn’t feel like a time waster.  The action scenes are briskly described and easy to follow, and the narrative through-line is clear. Iona has an identifiable goal, and it keeps the viewer riveted as to whether she will make it to the finish line or not, and who will still be alive when she gets there. When we see the survivors, we feel how much everyone struggled so they may live.











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